Zombies to Invade Book Store - Eat Customers!

So far it's kind of been pathetic. When I wrote Empire of Salt, I figured I'd have two built in markets- the living and the undead. So far the living have been snatching it up like free popcorn at a dive bar. No complaints at all. I'm happy. The editor is happy. The publisher is happy. Everyone who is living is happy. To date, I've only had a few sad zombies stagger by one of my signings. Of course it was in Bisbee, which could mean that they were real zombies, or just stoned.

Zombies in Bisbee

But now things are different. It must be hard getting the word out to the undead. Not that they don't listen, but with all the moaning and groaning, they probably can't even hear their cell phones ring. Lucky for me the Barnes and Nobles in Tucson (Broadway) has a direct line to the undead and has created a Zombie Event. Now, finally, members of the great rotting masses will be able to turn the pages of my ode to all things zombie.

They will be coming in the form of the Tucson Zombie Crawl. Ten to twenty book-loving zombies will be descending on Barnes and Nobles on Broadway. They have been asked politely by Valerie, the author liaison not to eat the author, nor chew chunks out of the staff. The Crawl acquiesced, but admitted that with the reduced availability of human flesh, it would be open season on the customers (Shhh. Let's keep that between us).

I feel honored that that they are finally coming to get a copy of my book. But at the same time I feel sorry for the store. Sales of Romance novels are bound to fall. But alternatively, and this is something they should anticipate, sales of survival manuals and gun magazines should absolutely soar.

Oh yeah! I've also been told that one or two might stop by for an interview, so that members of the audience can ask the burning questions like:

"Which do you prefer, white or dark meat?"

"How does it feel to be undead?"

"Do you get hassled by Border Patrol?"

"What about taxes? Do you still pay them?"

I think that if we can manage to keep the consumption of customers down to a minimum it's going to be an awesome afternoon. So if you are feeling brave, and if you think that you can outrun the person next to you, come on over at 1 PM and watch the blood bath as it unfolds. I'll be hosting a seminar on How to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse, After all, if you wait until the nightly news, you'll miss all the wonderful screams and the arching sprays of arterial blood.

Weston Ochse
Desert Grotto
Mexican Border